My goal is to make it to 2011 and beyond. I don’t know if this is a realistic outlook especially since I am under hospice care. I am no expert in the field but from what I have been able to find out hospice care is an end of life move, Here it is from a health care provider:
When a patient’s health care team determines that the cancer can no longer be controlled, medical testing and cancer treatment often stop.
I know a lot of people lie at this stage and come up with all sorts of optimistic advice meant to provide hope. Personally I think that is wrong. It might sound insensitive but I would prefer the truth and then take it from there. My instincts and observations made it clear that the truth was not being told regarding my chemo treatment or the cancer itself. Now the energy that was spent on following an optimistic outlook has been wasted, not that I was expecting a miraculous solution but it was time wasted, time that I don’t have. I think there were only two doctors that had the balls to tell me out front that I had cancer and it was not curable. Obviously they were not going to make any predictions as to the time left to me and I am thankful for that since it would be speculative.
Now I have to start thinking of that visit from JOE BLACK….
One Comment
I once read a book by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, To Live Until We Say Goodbye which shares with the reader exactly that. People living their moments in life until the time comes for no more moments. We all do that. Some know more or less how many moments we have left, some don’t. Knowing sometimes make us more appreciative of the moments we have left sometimes. Sometimes it makes those around us more appreciative of the time left. Love ya